I'm back! Billlaaaa

Tada! Assalamu Alaikum!

I'm back after 8months! Been travelling to Singapore and settling with my baby... Nowadays, I read up more on baby food, baby care.. bla bla... its the priority now. My little sweety is now 8months and a week old. We named her Aisyah Humaira - I guess i didnt update. Hehehe....

Post partum is no fun at all..seriously! Until now, I am on a one way emotional roller coaster. Feeling delighted smtimes...and all of a sudden I'm down..Haiz. And i really really hate it when I'm down. You know, the feeling when you don't know what made you sad,,but ur just sad and every single thing that happens around you irritates you and makes you fume?! And you just wanna punch every1 in the face and then run and dive in face down into a pool of iced water? Yeahhh....that happens! SSSOOOOOOO often! Totally no fun!

But I'm loving it. The way Aisyah says maa (I doubt she knows I'm maa) and her recent nae nae utterings.. and her humming sometime! YES! SHE SINGS! lol.... I'm totally enjoying it. Really, alhamdullilah..Thank you dear lord for blessing me with a baby, good health and the ability to stay at home and watch her grow.

=)

Day 2!

Bad breastfeeding experience... she bites toooo hard!

Day Uno!

pop tart has popped!

Alhamdullilah... i have delivered! Baby successfully landed on hospi bed at 10.41am on 15th Apr 2013.. i had mild contractions ttnite.. strted at bt maghrib.. n got worst arnd 1am.. at 1.30 nasri did e milo n egg shiok drink. N scary mary pains started at 1.40.. at 10 to 15mins intervals.. we came to hospi at 3.15am n got admitted abt 3.30.. dilated to 1.5cm.. n then at abt 6am i was dilated to almost 2cm...at 7 they brought me to labour room n got me on drips.. i was also given general painkiller.. tt helped me SOOO much. I cld sleep a little. I was given gas also.. then i cant realli remb when serious.contractions strted.. all i remb was i had e urge to push n e nurse told me not to.. cos e hole might get swollen.. unfortunately, i cldnt resist n juz pushed. Nasri was beside me calming me not to push.. but i cldnt resist. Alhamdullillah nothing happened though.. i got my baby out in a couple of pushes.. feel so blessed for e easy delivery

Juz a day from my due... n no signs of popping yet. Cervix has only opened to 1cm... i guess she is too comfy inside. Hehehe...

Mummy Returns...

Smhow.. when things seems to be ending, u realise it was only a vicious cycle.. i thot by getting my side down fr periyappa's 40th, things will get abit btr... but juz looks like things will get messed up again.. i dont know. Even nasri is nt consoling me or giving me any strength.. i feel so weak n skeptical. I juz wish he can give me a helping hand. Hold my hand n tell me 'we r in this together. We'd work this out. I'll help u'... but instead, he's juz blatantly putting e truth on a rusty platter... it hurts. Not feeling too good... im juz getting sandwhiched between both sides. but no matter wat.. i can never ever bear for dad to be scolded.. for his head to hang loose. Even if he deserves it.. i can never see him tt way

Hurt-Say Sorry-N buy her a Starbucks

I dont know y.. im feelg so distant from him.. he seems to be a completely different person.. i juz feel like im with sm1 else but not the same Nasri whom I loved.... is it that what he said tt day affected me so much? or.. im juz so disappointed?

He smsd me last afternoon saying sorry if he has hurt me. i didnt reply. i didnt know wat to say. i had so much to say rather than juz an ok. he brought me to starbucks last nite.. i didnt hv the heart to appreciate it or even say thank u. all i felt was... a coffee juz to make up for the hurt? r my feelings that cheap??

i dont know. hope allah gives me the graciousness to forgive n forget...